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When Brain Falls in Love

Love is chemical! Researchers at the UK’s Rutgers University claim that certain parts of the brain get all worked up and are the cause of how we behave with our loved one. In other words, neurons establish specific connections that cause and maintain the state of love. That’s how we manage to become attached to someone. The magic doesn’t work the same way for men and women. While men see their sexual desire aroused, women’s attractions are mainly based on feelings.

The study consisted of watching what exactly happened in the brain of someone who just started a relationship. The scientists used the MRI (magnetic resonance imagery) technique to examine the brain activities of a group of volunteers. Each time, they were first shown a photo of someone they knew then a photo of their loved one. When they saw this second photo it was the right side of the brain that suddenly started to produce dopamine, creating a surplus of energy that then turns into loving desire. For the different sexes this leads to two completely different attitudes!

The female brain activates itself in particular to develop an emotion based on feelings that’s translated into a surplus of attention towards their man. However, the man doesn’t weigh himself down with abstract thoughts and sets in motion the process of his sexual desire, which he sees in very concrete terms. The scientists’ conclusion: romance responds to a very specific mechanism in the brain, and it’s the difference between the two sexes that allows them to complement each other and feel good together. Men need sex, women want feelings, and together they succeed in offering each other what they want.

The neurons’ brain circuits are thus perfectly prepared to envisage a long-term relationship as long as the two partners complement each other and are in fact really in love. When a man wants sex and nothing else, he’s still never totally safe from being heart-broken if he finds the woman who represents exactly what he’s looking for. So the old adage that a man keeps his brains between his legs isn’t false, just as it’s true that a woman keeps her sex in her head…

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